Being With What Is

 Today is the fourth day that my sweet son could not cross the threshold from home to school. He is struggling in a brand new school in the 8th grade. Oh, how I regret our thinking and decision to try this new school. He was doing fine and we, he, thought he might like this bigger environment and do even better than fine.  

Anxiety and depression are in the mix and it is has been one of the hardest seasons as a parent. It is some days literally tearing me apart.

Today he didn't make it. But, I felt like we made some progress. He staying with it and me long enough to say how hard it is for him. We were able to talk about his struggles without him shutting down and yelling at me to just get out. 

I felt like he was listening. There was connection.

I left the house with him still at home but I am calling this progress. 

Both of us could be with it in a new way.